Interviews with the legends themselves
by Kairi Arashi
Summary: Insane Interviews with the Legends from Planet Zi! Third part... Featuring Irvine!! Guest star is certain feminine guy... ^_^ Harharhar
1. Chapter the First Hello Moonbay

Hi people! ^.^ This is my second fic. Well ok, I had two others posted, but the first was so crap I deleted it! This one will hopefully be a little better! Oh silly me I forgot to introduce myself! Rinoa Storm, at your service.  
  
Now what I'm going to be writing is a character interview with the characters from Zoids; Chaotic Century and Guardian Force. I don't know if anyone else has done one of these yet but hopefully not!  
  
My mission: To save the world from utter destructio - uh - I mean - to make at least one person larf. (Even if it is just myself, larfing at my own poor attempt at humour)   
  
So I'm going to start off by interviewing... *drum roll* Moonbay!!  
  
DISCLAIMER: A quisling is a traitor who aids the occupying enemy force. Thought you ought to know.  
  
REAL DISCLAIMER: High school is better known as a detention center.  
  
REAL REAL DISCLAIMER: There is no OPTUS service on Kangaroo Island, South Australia. Don't ever, EVER go there under the impression that there is, because you shall be mightily disappointed.  
  
REAL REAL REAL DISCLAIMER: Alright already! I don't own Zoids! (or optus, for that matter) If I did, why the hell would I be sitting around here, writing a fan fiction? Get real! I'd be out sloshing dosh all over the place! Firstly I'd have my car (the one I don't actually have) converted into a mega-wicked Zoid, then I would cruise around town with the windows down and shake it all around to the stereo sound. BTW, I don't own that song, either. Oh, and I don't own Dragonball Z. As a matter of fact, I don't own anything. Stick that in your pipe and smoke it.  
  
*clears throat* Alright now ON WITH THE SHOW!!!!  
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*cheesy music plays*  
  
ANNOUNCER: And now for your host, Stooooooorm!!!!  
  
Someone up the front holds up a card to the audience that says 'CLAP'. A camera-man coughs; crickets can be heard chirping cheerily away etck etck  
  
Storm walks ritzily on stage. She flashes a smile to the guy with long brown hair who held up the card.   
  
STORM: Hey sweety! That don't work if there ain't no people in the audience!   
  
The guy goes red.  
  
STORM: WHERE'S MY CO-HOST, THE SLACKER?!?  
  
ANNOUNCER: *sigh* Mr Flyheight gave us some pathetic excuse about saving a parallel word from utter destructio -  
  
STORM: Alright then! Hey you, card boy! You're my new co-host! Yeah you! Come up here!  
  
The boy walks shyly onto the stage.  
  
STORM: What's your name, you big chunk of hunk?  
  
ANNOUNCER: *sigh*  
  
CARD-BOY: Rudolf. Emperor Rudolf.  
  
STORM: Okay, Rudolf! Do you know who we're interviewing today?  
  
RUDOLF: *gets right into it* I sure do, Storm - Moonbay! Give her a big hand, everybody!  
  
Storm looks at the producer offside, as if to say 'Why was this guy a card-boy anyway?' The producer just shrugs.  
  
*Moonbay walks wobbily onto the stage (wobbily on the account of she's wearing ten-inch heels), her hair done up and wearing enough make up to make Dame Edna Everage look tame*  
  
ANNOUNCER: With the IQ of 17 and a seemingly endless supply of 'boys will be boys' lines, it's no wonder this gal is hot property!  
  
MOONBAY: *sits down* Just you watch your mouth, mister! Obviously you're the one with and IQ of 17 if you think you can insult this girl and get away with it!  
  
ANNOUNCER: *sweatdrop (which is quite an amazing feat, because he's just a disembodied voice)* Heh - and she's also hilariously funny!  
  
Storm and Rudolf have both sweatdropped, earning scorching looks from the producer who is always very fussy about what lands on the floor.  
  
STORM: Moonbay, please forgive our tactless disembodied announcer.  
  
MOONBAY: Oh, it's alright. After all, boys will be boys!  
  
PRODUCER: People will you get on with the interview?!? It's already 10 minutes (636 words) into the show and we haven't found out anything useful! You haven't even asked her a question! And please, stop sweatdropping or I'll have to get someone to come in to mop up the floor!  
  
Storm clears her throat, racking her brains for something to ask.  
  
STORM: So, Moonbay, how long is it since you bravely defended Van from the Gino Breaker in the Gustaf, resulting in your Gustaf almost being blown to smithereens?  
  
MOONBAY: Um, uh... (counts on her fingers) about a year!  
  
STORM: (nods) Aha and why is it that you have not yet repaired it properly?  
  
MOONBAY: Uh? Whadd'ya mean?  
  
STORM: Well, Moonbay, riddle me this... THE PANEL YOU HAD TO REPLACE THE OLD ONE IS STILL WHITE!!! HOW DO YOU EXPLAIN THIS TASTELESS ACT OF COLOURBLINDEDNESS, WHEN YOU'RE NOT EVEN COLOUR-BLIND?!?   
  
Blink. Blink blink.  
  
MOONBAY: Huh?  
  
STORM: WHY ISN'T IT PINK, MOONBAY, WHY ISN'T IT PINK?!?  
  
MOONBAY: Well, oh, I don't know, maybe I was TOO BUSY SAVING THE WORLD!!!  
  
Storm shakes her head in disgust.  
  
STORM: Pathetic. Absolutely pathetic.  
  
The producer is looking more than slightly strained now, and his hands are creeping steadily towards Storm's throat...  
  
RUDOLF: (hurriedly) Well folks that's all for now but we'll be back after a short break!  
*cheesy music plays*  
  
Two muscly men in suits walk onto the set, but their suits and muscles are the only thing they have in common. The first man's skin is completely green, and he has strange, pointy ears. The other is wearing a goofy grin and has spiky black hair.  
  
The green guy clears his throat. "Can't believe I'm doing this," he mutters. Then he speaks up. "Feeling low on fuel?"  
  
The goofy guy speaks. "Batteries need recharging?"  
  
In unison, they pull cereal boxes out from behind their backs and wave them around. "Then fill up on Sunflower Super!"  
  
"With it's great flavour and almost no nutritional value, it'll be like you're eating nothing at all!"  
  
"So remember, fill up on Sunflower Super!" The screen fades black, but due to a *cough* technical difficulty, you can still hear them.  
  
"That must be the single most embarassing moment in my entire life. I still can't believe I let Chi Chi bully me into this, Goku."  
  
"Ah, don't be so serious, Piccolo!"  
  
FADES TO BLACK...  
  
TBC  
I'll post the rest of the interview soon, as soon as I have finished it! Hope you liked, please R&R! ^.^ Seeya! 


	2. Chapter the Second Buhbye Moonbay

Think of your worst nightmare.  
  
Now realise;  
  
Compared to what you are about to experience...  
  
Your worst nightmare was like dancing in the rain.  
  
COZ I'M BAAAAAAAAAAACCK!!!!!!!!!!  
  
*crickets chirping again etck etck*  
  
Oh alright, so it hasn't actually been very long since I last tormented the world, but hey! I just LOVE a dramatic entrance!  
  
So... where was I? Ah yes, the disclaimers. Now now, don't go groaning, since we HAVE to have disclaimers I take great pleasure in being as sarcastic as I can. Have patience with a deluded teen.  
  
DISCLAIMER: Life is like a box of cheap chocolates. You never know what crap you're going to get first.  
  
REAL DISCLAIMER: I just got some new speakers and they're a bit crappy. Whenever my stupid, STUPID theme (the one wot I desperately need to change but cannot be bothered *ahem*) makes a CA-BLEEP noise it sounds like it's got a cold. I keep digging out a tissue for it but then I realise that I don't have any! So my poor little speakers have to go without. *cries* oh poor babies  
  
REAL REAL DISCLAIMER: Speaking of ('ACHOO!!!' bless you, speakers, bless you) crappy, har har, my screen is very stuffed! Every now and then I have to give it a THUMP because it flickers and turns the wrong colour! Oh no, the computer welfare is going to come and take my babies away from me! I hit my monitor and don't give my speakers any tissues! *sob*  
  
REAL REAL REAL DISCLAIMER: Well, I think everyone has had their fair share of insanity for the day now. I shalt be off. Farewell, farewell... (OUT DAMN SPOT!! *sweatdrop* hey I'm studying Macbeth @ the moment people, cut me some slack) P.S I don't own Zoids _  
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*drumroll* *gasps of excitement from whatever readers haven't died of boredom yet* *another drumroll*  
  
*cheesy music plays (same old, same old)*  
  
Smoke swirls on the screen, and clears to reveal a motley lot of people (in other words, a bunch of misfits). A 2D brown-haired girl (your loverly Moonbay) is sitting in the interview chair, and sitting opposite her are your favourite hosts, Storm and Rudolf. They are not looking nearly as good as they did before on account of they have bruises all over them that have been covered up with laers of make-up. They are sitting very stiffly, and off-stage the producer is rubbing his hands together in glee, looking smug and cackling evilly etck etck  
  
ANNOUNCER: Aaaaaaaaaaaaand welcome back to your faaaaaaaaaaaaavourite show starring your faaaaaaaaaaaaaaavourite hosts, Storm and Ruuuuuudooooooolf! Aaaaaaaand a big round of applause for Mooooooooonbaaaaaaay!  
  
STORM: Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaand that wasn't forced at aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaall!  
  
RUDOLF: (quietly to Storm) Looks like the producer got to him too.  
  
STORM: (shakes her head sadly) It just ain't right, I tell you! Just ain't right.  
  
Offside, producer clears his throat, sending everyone on stage into a flurry of activity.  
  
STORM: So, Moonbay. (nods)  
  
MOONBAY: Storm. (nods)  
  
RUDOLF: Storm. (nods)  
  
STORM: Rudolf. (nods)  
  
MOONBAY: Rudolf. (nods)  
  
RUDOLF: Moonbay. (nods)  
  
ANNOUNCER: Moonbay, Rudolf, Storm. (nods)  
  
A period of stunned silence descends on the group, finally broken by gift-of-the-gab Storm.  
  
STORM: Uh - wha - did the announcer just nod?  
  
ANNOUNCER: (nods again)  
  
STORM: Hmm.  
  
RUDOLF: How is that possible? He is just a disembodied voice.  
  
MOONBAY: And while we're on the subject, how is it possible for him to sweatdrop? He doesn't even exist materially, let alone exist as a 2D figure!  
  
STORM: (exasperatedly) And while we're on the subject, how is it possible for a 3D Aussie like myself to be sitting in the same room as two 2D characters? God, Moonbay, don't get so bloody technical.  
  
PRODUCER: Is it time for another ad break?  
  
Everyone shakes their heads (AN: gramatically correct there? eesh I don't know!) hurriedly and decide to FINALLY get on with the interview.  
  
  
STORM: So Moonbay, what do you plan to do with the rest of your life?  
  
MOONBAY: Well actually, ever since Van saved the planet Zi again, I've been training for Zoids races - you know, like the one Rudolf bet me in?  
  
STORM: I see. How've you been going?  
  
MOONBAY: Really good.  
  
STORM: Well that's nice to know.  
  
RUDOLF: (thougthfully) Hey Moonbay?  
  
MOONBAY: Yes sweety?  
  
RUDOLF: Howcome we never heard of the fact that you were a champion racer before that episode?  
  
MOONBAY: (silence)  
  
STORM: Hey yeah! I always wondered why that episode was stuck in there.They seemed to just invent bits about Moonbay in one episode for the sole purpose of comic relief in the middle of a serious bit in the series. It didn't seem right that Moonbay never told anyone about her amazing ability, especially considering the size of her ego!  
  
RUDOLF: But if you think about it, it's not like Moonbay was such a terribly complicated character that they couldn't add any details to her shallow self.  
  
MOONBAY: You People Are HORRIBLE!! How DARE you speak about ME that way?!?  
  
STORM: Quite EASILY! You should TRY IT!!  
  
RUDOLF: Oh no. (he's spotted the producer creeping up again, wearing a look of insanity that unfortunately is becoming a common sight for poor Rudolf) Please don't, Mr Producer Sir -  
  
ANNOUNCER: Time for some more ads, because we know you just ADORE them!  
  
Instead of fading to black this time, it is suddenly cut off. It would seem that the producer is VERY anrgy this time.  
  
A new screen begins to appear. You hear voices ('ACHOO!!!!' bless you, speakers!).  
  
VOICE ONE: Hey Krillin, that Storm chick is a real looker!  
  
VOICE TWO, aka KRILLIN: Yeah, Yamcha, I know!  
  
*CA-THUMP!!!!* KRILLIN: AI-YAH!! OWWWWWWWWW, Eighteen that HURT!!  
  
Now you can see the characters on the screen. A black-haired dude with a scar on his face is standing next to a short, nose-less black-haired guy, who is rubbing his head and wincing. Next to him is a stylish blonde-haired woman, who is wearing a venomous look on her face, her arms crossed.  
  
KRILLIN: What did you do that for?  
  
EIGHTEEN: You're MARRIED, Krillin. You're not SUPPOSED to say things like that.  
  
KRILLIN: (sweatdrop) Oh yeah - hehehe...  
  
YAMCHA: Hey, did you know we're on air right now?  
  
KRILLIN: We are?  
  
Krillin sticks his face up to the camera, and starts pulling a number of faces.  
  
EIGHTEEN: (scowls) Krillin -  
  
KRILLIN: Hey Marron my little sweety! Look, Daddy's on TV!  
  
YAMCHA: Krillin, have you forgotten? We're meant to be doing an ad now.  
  
KRILLIN: (shrugs and continues the faces) Hahaha who cares?  
  
YAMCHA: (going crazy) Krillin, think of the money!  
  
EIGHTEEN: Yeah, what about the MONEY, Krillin?!?  
  
KRILLIN: (Finally returns from the camera) So what, 20 million wasn't enough for you?  
  
YAMCHA: (sweatdrops) Uh - What exactly are we meant to be selling anyway?  
  
KRILLIN: Some shampoo.  
  
YAMCHA: Which one?  
  
CAMERA GUY: You are off air in 5 - 4...  
  
EIGHTEEN: (turns quickly to the camera) Uh - Shampoo. Buy it.  
  
The screen fades to black again...  
  
*cheesy music plays*  
  
The group is looking even more ruffled than before, excepting Moonbay who the producer went nowhere near. (AN: See? Even evil guys aren't stupid all the time!)  
  
STORM: Ad breaks should be illegal. (AN: And don't we all agree, viewers?)  
  
RUDOLF: I agree.   
  
MOONBAY: I agree.   
  
STORM: That's nice deary. Why do you agree, hmm Moonbay? Where are your bruises? HMM?!? RIDDLE ME THIS, MOONBAY, RIDDLE ME THIS!!!  
  
ANNOUNCER: Well, that's all we have time for today folks! Thankyou Moonbay for coming in!  
  
STORM: Uh mister announcer SIR I believe that is MY line...!  
  
ANNOUNCER: Yes but missus interviewer MA'AM you had no intention of saying YOUR line for a while, did you?!? And I figured that you wouldn't want another ad break yet...  
  
STORM: (goes pale) Uh yes well thankyou Moonbay for coming in today! S'been a pleasure and all that, good luck with your racing, say hello to everyone for us! (pushes Moonbay off the stage) Next interview, people, we have coming in to talk with us the legendary IRVINE!!!  
  
RUDOLF: Really?  
  
STORM: Yep! (says knowingly) He's an even bigger chunk of hunk than you!  
  
RUDOLF: Sorry, Storm, but that's SO not possible.  
  
STORM: (thoughtfully) You know, you are the most Out-of-Character character I have EVER written - er, met! Bad Rudolf!  
  
Meanwhile, Moonbay has limped back onto stage (she is limping on account of she sprained her ankle on her ten-inch heels when Storm pushed her off-stage *hehehe OOPSIES* AN: ooh do I sense some hostility there?). She is outraged at Storm's earlier tasteful *NOT* comment about Irvine being a 'chunk of hunk'.  
  
MOONBAY: (shakes her fist) You can't have Irvine, Storm! He LOVES me!  
  
STORM: (looks back at her scathingly, raises her eyebrows etck) That's nice deary.  
  
RUDOLF: (waves at the audience as things start to turn ugly again) Bye everyone! Tune in next time!  
  
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Well? What's the verdict? I had fun writing this ^_^ har har EvIl PrOdUcEr  
  
OoOoOoOoOoOoH My FoOtSiEs ArE CoLd! Ohnoohno I think I'm catching the cold from my speakers! (major sweatdrop)  
  
Big THANKYOU goes out to the wonderful, wonderful people who reviewed my first ever chapter of this story! Maelgwyn and Anime Shark, YOU ROCK!! Yesss Maelgwyn I am an SA Aussie!  
  
Hope some people liked this chapter! ^.^ Seeya! 


	3. Chapter the Third Buhbye Announcer Hello...

Yasou! Bon giorno! Ola! Bonjour! Chao (I dare someone to tell me that's spelt wrong... it's Vietnamese, not Italian)! Konnichiwa! Hello! *readers throw remote control at her* Owwww that HURT! I was only being friendly! And dude, what's up with the remote control?!?  
  
*clears throat* Ok well anyway, it is me, back again, yes indeedee, and you are reading the Interviews with the Legends themselves, yes indeedee, but I don't know why exactly! +_+ yes well I am a little strange today...  
  
How about i just stop talking, get the disclaimer thing out of the way, and get on with the interview, nyeh? Sounds good.  
DISCLAIMER: *Storm cackles evilly, rubs her hands together in anticipation etck etck* Interesting Fact: Linkin Park did the original opening song for DBZ! Did you know that? Huh? Didyadidyadidya?!? *audience crosses arms impatiently and nods... Storm pouts* Ok well I didn't know, so - so - UGH! I hate being dumb sometimes... (but only sometimes)  
  
REAL DISCLAIMER (snort): TV ads show you how detergents take out bloodstains. I think if you've got a bloodstained T-shirt, maybe laundry isn't your biggest problem. (Storm: ok, so that wasn't original, but it's godamm funny.)  
  
REAL REAL DISLAIMER: You know, some people have problems getting along with other people... particularly getting along with me. All you have to realise is that the sooner you start worshipping me, the sooner we'll all be living in ~harmony~. Oh and if you want you can worship Anime Shark, cos Anime Shark is just the best (you RULE!) Anime Shark gave me two reviews! TWO!! ^_^ And that other dudette Rules as well!  
  
Oh har, har har har, hardi har har, I do crack myself up sometimes. Maybe a little bit of superglue will do it... *dodges remote control* BlOoDy HeLl YoU pEoPlE aRe ViOlEnT!!!  
  
REAL REAL REAL DISCLAIMER: For all those who care, my speakers have recovered from their cold, and are no longer sneezing over my work of art. All I can say is Thank Bloody God. Oh yeah and Happy Easter ya'll! Oooh I'm rude sometimes... ~sacriligious~ oOoHh *x-files music* Controversy...  
  
And for all those who DON'T care about my speakers, may you fall in a puddle of mud.   
  
A really, really DEEP puddle of mud.  
  
REAL REAL REAL REAL DISCLAIMER: I don't own anything, I don't know anything, and I did not witness that murder on 36th street at 10 o'clock last night.   
  
What do you mean, 'what murder'?!?   
_________________________________^_^_____________________________________  
  
*cheesy music plays* No, wait!! Hold the Fone!! Cheesy music does NOT play any more! This program is now hip, kewl, kule, cule, cool, kool and Kuwl! So let me start again!  
_________________________________^_^_____________________________________  
  
*funky music plays* ~PlaY DaT FuNkY MuZiK wItE BoY~  
  
ANNOUNCER: Aaaaand now for your favourite show, Legends With the Interviews Themselves! Uh... um... I mean...   
  
Storm, yours truly, walks onto the stage, waving and smiling etck etck.  
  
STORM: *out of the corner of her mouth* What, haven't had your coffee yet?  
  
ANNOUNCER: Aaaaand here's your favourite host, Thunder! No, wait, that can't be right...  
  
STORM: *hands on hips* Stop it. Please. You're embarassing me. Shame on you. SHAME on you.  
  
ANNOUNCER: And today's co-host is... Simon the Sorceror!  
  
STORM: *stomps her foot* You are HOPELESS today! Sit down before you hurt yourself!  
  
ANNOUNCER: But watch out for those Killer Whales! Reports say they are storming the city!  
  
Storm runs offstage for a moment, and drags the producer back on with her. Whispering in the producer's ear, she points up at a certain spot in the roof, where the disembodied voice of the Announcer resides. The producer nods, and pulls out a tranquilizer gun, which he has somehow kept hidden until now, just like a lot of anime superpeople tend to do. He then proceeds to load it up with a wicked-looking tranquilizer dart thingy. The announcer rambles on, unaware of the Controversy unfolding beneath him.  
  
ANNOUNCER: *advertising woman voice (you know, when you turn the TV on in the middle of the day and see an ad for something like nose-hair removal)* You should drink 8 glasses of water a day to stay healthy. You know, most humans live in a constantly Dehydrated state! By the time you feel thirsty, you're already Dehydrated!  
  
The producer fiddles with the gun a little more, frowning. Storm leans over his shoulder, eyes questioning, and he shrugs, indicating that he doesn't know what's wrong with it. Storm lifts her wrist and taps her watch meaningfullly, then points at the Announcer again.  
  
ANNOUNCER: SCHHH NEWSFLASH NEWSFLASH Scientists have only just discovered that drinking water may endanger your health! Apparently, drinking eight glasses of water a day leaves you bloated and unbalanced. When driving a car after 8 glasses of water, turning a corner causes the water to slosh to one side, the momentum of which swinging your car to that side too. This is reportedly the cause of many of today's Car Casualties. Scientists are recommending that everyone stops drinking all water immediately. Why does my heart... feel so bad... why does my soul...  
  
The producer stomps his foot. He squints at the gun, wondering what on earth is wrong with it.  
  
ANNOUNCER: Get get down, down down d-down. Get get down, down down d-down. Get get down, down down do-down. Get get down down down down, down down down down, dow-n dow-n dow-n down. Woo!  
  
The producer is almost in hysterics. Storm places a hand on his shoulder reassuringly, as if to say, "Calm down, and let the experts deal with this one." The producer raises an eyebrow, but steps back. Storm whips a MASSIVE gun out from behind her back, Tomb Raider style, and the producer's eyes almost pop out of his head. Storm aims it carefully at the roof, at the exact spot she pointed to before. Her finger hovers on the trigger for just a second...  
  
ANNOUNCER: I love Aer-o-plane Jelleeeeeeeeee! Aer-o-plane Jelly for m - *Storm shoots, the boom of the gun deafening, and she is definitely NOT off target* AAAAAAAAAAARRRRRRGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!  
  
A terrible scream fills the studio, then all is silent.   
  
The producer swallows, and turns to Storm.  
  
EVIL PRODUCER: Th - thankyou, Storm.  
  
Storm grins, waving the gun around as she gesticulates (that is NOT a rude word).  
  
STORM: Any time!  
  
EVIL PRODUCER: May I ask... how did you happen to be carrying around a MASSIVE Tomb Raider style gun?  
  
STORM: *shrugs casually* I didn't feel like getting bashed up by you again today.  
  
CONVERTED PRODUCER: Yes. I see. That's using your initiative. Keep up the good work. You know what? I'll give you a pay rise for your good work, how's that? Anyway, on with the show.  
  
The now-meek producer bows (Japanese style, hands palm together in front of him) and disappears.  
  
STORM: So, on with the show! Today, on what's left of my air-time, I'm going to be interviewing the legendary Irvine! Give him a big hand, everybody!  
  
Yesh, well you all know the story... there's no-one in the audience, so nobody claps. Snobs. (AN: Hey maybe... No I'll put that in at the end of the story)  
  
Storm turns to the hopeless guy holding up the CLAP card.   
  
STORM: Hey, dude!  
  
He turns around. "Yes?"  
  
Storm is startled by his somewhat feminine appearance, but as she has no co-host...  
  
CARD-BOY: *squeals* Oh goodee! Alright! Ok, now doesn't somebody have to do my makeup? Come on people, move it! What am I paying you for?  
  
The mother of all sweatdrops has appeared on Storm's head, but fortunately the producer is too busy wondering where Storm got that massive gun to notice.  
  
After Card-Boy/Girl/? is all prettied up, or as pretty as he'll ever be anyway(=), Storm turns to him/her/?.  
  
STORM: Ok, time to get with the program, card-boy. We are about to interview one of the hunkiest chunks on Planet Zi, so just keep quiet, ok?  
  
CARD-BOY: *tosses hair impatiently* Whatever. And my name's Stinger. Get it right.  
  
STORM: Whatever!  
  
Storm stands as Irvine walks onto stage.   
  
STORM: Irvine! So glad you could make - *stops suddenly*  
  
Irvine had made it halfway across the stage, saw Stinger, and promptly walked off again, without missing a beat.  
  
STORM: Irvine! *he ignores her. bad idea* IRVINE! GET YOUR 2D BUTT BACK ON THIS STAGE RIGHT N-O-W!!!!!  
  
She's so loud, even the windows are rattling. Most unusually for Irvine, except in circumstances where his life is in danger or where he's recently stolen something, he scuttles back on stage and plonks his 2D butt in the interview chair before you could say, "Noodles, chocolate and peanut butter make 11 Gold a crunchy lunch." (AN: Please. Don't even ask.)  
  
STORM: *smiling* As I was saying, so glad you could join us.  
  
STINGER: Actually, you were saying how glad you were he could make -  
  
STORM: *growls at Stinger* Shut it! *to Irvine now* So Irvine, I hear you've been part of the Guardian Force for some time now.  
  
IRVINE: *scowling* How many times do I have to tell you people, I'm not a part of the GF?!?  
  
STORM: For your INFORMATION, Irvine, I've never spoken to you before in my entire life. So technically, you have never, EVER told me that before.  
  
IRVINE: Well then, TECHNICALLY, you know nothing about me. So why are you interviewing me?  
  
STINGER: Because you're cute!  
  
Everyone sweatdrops, even the producer.  
  
IRVINE: *to Stinger* Anyway, what the HELL are you doing here?  
  
STINGER: *blushing* Well I heard Moonbay might be coming, so...  
  
STORM: You idiot. Moonbay came last time. Anyway, ShutUp. And why do you look so much like a girl?  
  
STINGER: It's all part of the mind games I like to play.  
  
Blink.  
  
Blink, blink.  
  
STORM: oooooookay, I think I'll just leave that one there for now. You can wear as much makeup as you like, just ShutUp.  
  
IRVINE: *shakes head* It just ain't natural.  
  
Suddenly, realisation dawns for Storm.  
  
STORM: YOU!!! You're... STINGER!!   
  
STINGER: No, really?  
  
Stinger winces as Storm thumps him. HARD.  
  
STINGER: OWWW!!! What was that for?!?  
  
STORM: You're the dude that tortured my legends! (AN:Woa. Very weird sentence.)  
  
STINGER: *blinks* I'm sorry. I don't comprehend.  
  
STORM: COMPREHEND THIS, BI*CH!!! *thumps him again*  
  
PRODUCER: (from offstage) STORM! THAT'S ENOUGH! I'M THE ONLY ONE WHO CAN THUMP PEOPLE HERE!  
  
Realisation suddenly dawns on Storm again, and she backs off, white as a sheet.   
  
STORM: Y - you *gulp* You're DEAD!  
  
STINGER: Well duh. No shishkamabobs, Sherlock.  
  
STORM: That evil dude crushed you! Har har, you died!  
  
IVRINE: Yeah. He escaped prison just in time to be killed by the second big bad guy. Talk about irony.  
  
STORM: Yeah, well, whatever man.  
Suddenly, Moonbay rushes onto stage, breathless.  
  
MOONBAY: So sorry I'm late!  
  
STORM: Well this is de` ja vu.  
  
MOONBAY: Yeah, I know! Doesn't it feel like we only did this last week?  
  
STORM: That's because we DID do this last week. Get off, Moonbay, one interview with you was more than enough.  
  
STINGER: See? I told you Moonbay was coming.  
  
Storm thumps him again. Moonbay has now latched onto Irvine, who is looking very annoyed.   
  
IRVINE: Get offa me! This top doesn't dry-clean itself, you know! (AN: sweatdrop)  
  
He pushes Moonbay off, but she winks at him.  
  
MOONBAY: You know you love me.  
  
STINGER: *stands up, outraged* You *****!! You love ME!!  
  
IRVINE: Yeah, Moonbay. You don't want to let our pretty (STORM: *snorts* Pretty? Yeah, pretty UGLY!!) friend down, do you? It's ok, you can be with him instead of me. I'll get over it.  
  
MOONBAY: But - no, Irvine, I couldn't do that to you! I don't want to hurt you like that!  
  
IRVINE: *stressing* No, it's REALLY ok. In fact, I'd be much happier if you were with him.   
  
MOONBAY: *thoughtfully* Are you sure?  
  
STORM: YES HE'S SURE!! GET OFF OF MY AIR SPACE BEFORE I THUMP YOU!! YOU TOO, STINGER, YOU PRETTY PIECE OF POOH!!!  
  
Moonbay and Stinger both straighten, salute, and run off stage. Storm sighs in relief and turns back to Irvine.   
  
STORM: Now, Irvine, I haven't actually asked you anything yet...  
  
Suddenly she is interrupted by someone singing. Storm jumps up, outraged. I (snigger) wonder who it could be?  
_________________________^_^________________________  
We-he-hell! I liked that! I love that announcer man! He's so FUNKY!!  
  
Oh, and if you're wondering what song the person was singing, I didn't hear it very well, but I think it sounded something like... "Get get down, down down d-down..." But I don't know the next words. Oh well, maybe that helped you figure out who it is... *wink*  
Ok well I better go, coz I'm a teen and right now being a teen just sucks lollipops, man! DOWN WITH PYTHAGORAS, THE BAST-  
  
Ooookeeee dookeee Oh yeah and what I was going to say, way up there in the midst of my non-interviewing interview, was that I need a studio audience! My card-boys can't hold up cards to no-one forever, you know! So if you want to be in my audience, just say so in that little review thing! And if for some reason I'm not meant to get you to do that (let's just say I didn't spend HOURS going through the FanFiction.net rules and regulations), just email me on sabriel_storm@dbzmail.com! And if I wasn't even meant to post my email address there, plz 4give me!  
Toorah ^_^ 


End file.
